SCP-4090: The Dream of the Anartist's Son

The following chat logs were archived by the Foundation due to their connection with SCP-4090.

horner joined

bluntfiend: thanks weed that lets u talk to god
zazzbery: thanks 420 praise it
bluntfiend: thanks exactly lmao
horner: thanks Hey, is this where I go to ask about works?
bluntfiend: thanks yeah
bluntfiend: thanks are you new
horner: thanks Yeah, and I wanted to ask about commissioning a work.
zazzbery: thanks lmao we arent deviantart
zazzbery: thanks we just make shit we dont work on commission
zazzbery: thanks ill draw your fursona if u want tho
horner: thanks I know, but I really want this very particular piece of artwork and I don't know how to get it myself. Can someone help me?
bluntfiend: thanks no offense but zazz is right lmao go ask da
horner: thanks It's for my dad.
zazzbery: thanks youre using punctuation
zazzbery: thanks are you a cop
zazzbery: thanks legally you have to tell us otherwise its entrapment
horner: thanks I'm not a cop! I'm here to talk about my dad. He makes art like you guys.
zazzbery: thanks daddy issues
zazzbery: thanks im listening

new PM from bluntfiend

bluntfiend: thanks you cant oblige this kid because their dads an anartist
bluntfiend: thanks we dont do commissions
zazzbery: thanks do u think this is charlie horner's kid
zazzbery: thanks if it is ive met them irl
bluntfiend: thanks were you at
zazzbery: thanks cincinnati 2009 baby
bluntfiend: thanks so you saw
zazzbery: thanks damn near lost my hand
bluntfiend: thanks theres no evidence to suggest that theyre charlie horners kid
zazzbery: thanks 5 bucks says they are
bluntfiend: thanks fuck off

zazzbery: thanks hey horner
horner: thanks Yes?
zazzbery: thanks you charlies kid
horner: thanks Yes.
bluntfiend: thanks holy shit

new PM from bluntfiend

bluntfiend: thanks zazz
bluntfiend: thanks stop humoring him
zazzbery: thanks listen charlie horners a jag
zazzbery: thanks i dont have a personal vendetta but youve seen the guys work
bluntfiend: thanks is he with awcy
zazzbery: thanks no hes freelance
bluntfiend: thanks just cause you dont like his art doesnt mean you can take a revenge commission from a
bluntfiend: thanks how old is he
zazzbery: thanks cincinnati he was 5
zazzbery: thanks so what like 14
bluntfiend: thanks every 14 year old hates their dad zazz
bluntfiend: thanks thats no excuse
zazzbery: thanks dont you fuckin devalue the shit parents can put their kids through ok
zazzbery: thanks god knows my dad did a number on me when i was his age
zazzbery: thanks im gonna hear him out
bluntfiend: thanks you better not put our name on it whatever you do
zazzbery: thanks relax

horner: thanks You've seen his work, yeah?
zazzbery: thanks yeah
horner: thanks It's all shock-value stuff. Blood, guts, viscera, everything. And it's like, that's the only way he interacts with anybody. It's his only language.
zazzbery: thanks what do you mean
horner: thanks Like, this one time, I missed my curfew. I came back from my friend's house at, like 11:30. And I walk into the kitchen and there's my dad, in six pieces on the floor.
horner: thanks Like a grenade went off inside his stomach. And he's plastered all over the walls, and his eyeballs are rolling around on the linoleum.
horner: thanks And then his skull rolls over, with bits of flesh hanging off it, and it looks up at me, and it goes:
horner: thanks And then my dad steps out of the fridge, hands me a mop, and tells me to clean it up.
horner: thanks I buried him in the yard while he stood on the porch and watched me.
horner: thanks That stuff doesn't HAPPEN to other kids! They just get yelled at! What the FUCK?!
horner: thanks Sorry. That was a lot.
zazzbery: thanks listen horner i feel for you
bluntfiend: thanks but we still dont do commissions
zazzbery: thanks stfu blunt im gonna do it
bluntfiend: thanks jesus
zazzbery: thanks none of this jokey memey shit either
zazzbery: thanks i have some ideas but the problem is gonna be shipping em
zazzbery: thanks ill whip you up something pro bono
zazzbery: thanks ill PM you with the details
zazzbery: thanks one product of a bad dad to another

bluntfiend has left

entering PM with horner

horner: thanks Can you sabotage his next exhibition? I hear him working with rotary saws in the garage. I could send one to you.
zazzbery: thanks ok listen i get that youre mad at him
horner: thanks You could say that, yeah.
zazzbery: thanks but im not gonna make something thatll hurt him for real
horner: thanks Why not?!
zazzbery: thanks its not productive
horner: thanks I don't want productive! I want him to hurt!
zazzbery: thanks listen horner i know
horner: thanks Clearly you don't!
horner: thanks Cleary you have no idea what I'm talking about, or you'd be with me!
zazzbery: thanks horner
zazzbery: thanks if i went through all the shit my dad did to me right now it would make your acne covered head spin
zazzbery: thanks so be quiet and listen
horner: thanks Okay. I'm sorry.
zazzbery: thanks its ok im not mad
zazzbery: thanks im gonna give you what i wish i had had back then
zazzbery: thanks its a place thats gonna be all yours
zazzbery: thanks just to go and breathe easy when things get hard
zazzbery: thanks do you like vaporwave
horner: thanks What's that?
zazzbery: thanks its just a color palette. you're gonna like it trust me
horner: thanks Okay.
zazzbery: thanks and if things ever do really get truly bad
zazzbery: thanks and you actually want to do something about it then i can be there
zazzbery: thanks i can take on some of your burdens for you
zazzbery: thanks just hold this thing's hand and ill see what i can do
zazzbery: thanks but horner?
horner: thanks Yeah?
zazzbery: thanks this is serious
zazzbery: thanks only do it if you really aren't safe around him
zazzbery: thanks because i cant do it for long at a time
zazzbery: thanks understand?

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